


Crimes? Crimes.

by one_off_mind



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Gen, Oma Kokichi Is a Little Shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:55:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,201
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21516409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/one_off_mind/pseuds/one_off_mind
Summary: Kokichi ropes Kiibo into doing some crimes.
Kudos: 11





	Crimes? Crimes.

Friday nights always seemed to be the perfect time to do anything, be it alone or with friends. With little to no commitments, worries or stressors to deal with, the options were endless. One could go see a movie or take a walk in the park, spend all night partying or curl up in bed with a cat. 

For K1-B0, the definition of a perfect Friday night was sitting and reading in the calm quiet of his room, buried beneath an unrealistic number of blankets. The robot had very little real use for them, given he didn't have the ability to truly feel cold or hot. Regardless, he found the activity comfortable, and insisted on enjoying it as often as he could. 

He had hardly gotten started on the first paragraph of the book before his door came flying open, the doorway suddenly filled with the figure of his roomate. "Kiibo!"

"Kokichi." Kiibo sighed. Deep inside, he knew things could never be so perfect for too long.

Kokichi let himself in, a wide grin spreading across his face. "Come on, come on! We're going out!"

Kiibo frowned. "Going where...?"

All while bouncing exitedly, Kokichi leaned in close as though he were about to share the biggest secret of his life. "We're gonna do a B and E."

Ignoring the fact that this revelation hardly answered his first question, Kiibo now had a new one. What in the world was Kokichi talking about? It wasn't unusual for him to spout some sort of nonsense, or even come up with a particularly unfathomable lie. But at least those were more than just a couple of random letters. B and E? What was that even supposed to stand for?

The more he thought about it, the more confused he seemed to get, but after a few minutes, it hit finally him.

"Kokichi... Kokichi, no! You can't... we can't do that!"

"Neeheehee~" The human boy giggled, already marching back towards the door. "It's too late to change my mind now! You have to come with me, otherwise I'll get myself killed and it'll be all your fault. You'll be alone forever!"

Kiibo definitely didn't want that. Sure, his friend was a pain in the rear end to deal with most of the time, but there was no way he'd let him die because of it.

After much hesitation, he finally gave in, and the two of them wasted no time in leaving. Unfortunately for Kiibo, Kokichi seemed to know exactly what he was doing, if the suspicious bulging bag he had on him was any indication. He wanted to ask about it, but the answer he would recieve likely wouldn't have been one he liked, so he kept quiet. 

The walk to the nearest convenience store was a short one. In fact, it shocked Kiibo that Kokichi wasn't going bigger. In lieu of voicing that thought aloud, though, he decided to share his concerns for what felt like the hundredth time.

"I don't think this is a good idea Kokichi, I mean, look around us. Someone could walk up at any second-"

"Then I guess we'll have to be quick." 

"B-but..." Kiibo looked around. "There are security cameras!"

"You're a robot. Fuck up the signal or something, you can do it." Kokichi's voice was frighteningly calm as he set down his bag and pulled from it a set of lockpicks. "Come onnnn, we don't have all night!"

Kiibo swallowed down nothing as he hesitantly scanned his surroundings to locate the cameras. Counting the ones inside the building itself, there were five. Kiibo walked over to the nearest utility pole, and after resting his hand against it, closed his eyes and concentrated. A few seconds later, all the electricity on that street shorted out, knocking out not only the lights, but the cameras as well.

"Neat!" Kokichi exclaimed. "Now, let's go!"

Kiibo spun on his heels. "Wait, Kokichi! It's not too late to think this over, we can still-"

"Can't hear you!" Kokichi reeled back and then swung his foot out against the door, sending it flying wide open. He didn't need to kick the door in, especially given he had just picked the locks mere seconds ago. 

If Kiibo had any blood, it would have all rushed from his face in fear at that very moment. However, not wanting to stick around in case any curious people tried to figure out what happened with the sudden blackout, he rushed inside the store as well. 

The place was unremarkable, the type of store you'd see in every neighborhood where one could by snacks or cigarettes and kids could hang out. Everything was neatly stacked and organized on the shelves, but Kiibo had an inkling they wouldn't stay that way for very long. 

Kokichi pulled a crowbar from his bag and shoved it into Kiibo's arms, before pulling out a metal bat of his own to use. "Let's do some crimes."

"How did these fit in your bag...?" Kiibo quietly asked, looking for anything to keep his mind from the absolute worst situation anyone could possibly be in.

Kokichi grinned, "Plot convenience." Without missing a beat, he took a hard swing at the nearest shelf, knocking a good deal of its wares onto the floor.

Kiibo could only watch in horror as his friend began to absolutely tear the place apart. It shocked him how strong this tiny boy seemed to be. Shelves toppled over, glass shattered and the sounds of metal clanging against metal filled the small shop's interior. If Kiibo didn't know better, he'd assume a stampede of sorts was trampling its' way through the store. It felt like ages before finally there was dead silence.

"...Kokichi...?" The robot quietly called into the pitch darkness, clutching his crowbar close to himself. 

"Okay! I'm done!" 

Moments later, Kokichi appeared amidst all the broken glass and toppled display shelves, smiling as though nothing about this setting was wrong in the slightest bit. 

Kiibo sputtered, trying and failing to fully comprehend the situation. "You- but we- you didn't even steal anything!"

Kokichi stopped in front of the door, still kicked wide open. "This is a B and E, Kiiboy. Breaking and Entering." He gestured to the demolished store enterior. "We did the breaking, and we did the entering. Now we're doing the leaving before the maintenance people get here to fix the power lines." 

"But... what am I even here for...?" Kiibo asked quietly. 

"Well if we had gotten caught then I would've put the blame on you. Lucky you that we didn't!"

Without waiting for a response, Kokichi bolted from the store, disappearing around the corner. Kiibo just stood there, trying to process the emotional rollercoaster he had just been pushed onto without warning. 

He could've been at home, safe and cozy with an interesting book, wasting the hours of the night turning page after page. But no, instead he was here, witnessing the destruction of some random convenience store that the owner would return to in the morning, not only horrified by the state of their shop, but thoroughly perplexed about the fact that nothing had even been taken. 

Kiibo sighed in defeat, "I hate Fridays..."

**Author's Note:**

> This was shamelessly inspired by this video: https://youtu.be/1Bs_qsmhgdI


End file.
